forcing it.

If you needed a sign to come to terms with a situation you’ve been forcing, this is the one. Whether it be a relationship that is past due, a friendship that has long bitten the dust, trying to keep up with the Joneses or anything else that you’ve been putting an excessive amount of force…

silence.

The silence can be loud. Loud enough to make you wake up sweating, trying to recount and decode the crazy dream you had. Or, it can be warm and inviting. Cleansing you and enveloping you in a space that seems like home. I’ve experienced both versions of silence during this quarantine. Each one tells me…

dear black girl

Find yourself in one or two, or maybe all of them. After all, there is no one way to be a black girl. to the awkward black girl… Your complexities and quirks make you different. You might feel as though you don’t belong in certain spaces because you’re more reserved, but you belong in every…

nightmares from the bottom

It all started with a tweet. Well, really this has been on my mind for months. For some reason there is a trend in those who have reached success, turning around to snub those on their way up. Let’s unpack. The majority of issues can be resolved when somebody looks into the tone and taste…

fresh.

Welcome to in the words of vic, formerly known as quintessentially speaking! In addition to improved elements and new additions coming to the blog this year, I figured that a name change would be appropriate. Speaking of new and fresh… Restoration. Preparation. Access.  These are my words for the new year, which is also something…

There is room for all of us

    Please stop perpetrating the notion that there can only be one successful or smart black girl in the room. I’ve always noticed the hints of competition riddled with shady comments and side eyes but lately it’s been super thick and I’m desperately waiting for the decline. The external pressures that society puts on…

Get Out of Your Head

  Overthinking is a game of tug of war within mind where one side is consumed with everything that is wrong in my life and the other side is begging and tugging that I stop the madness and relax. I recently moved to Maryland and I’ve been in shambles for the past two weeks. I…

Give Yourself Credit

  Imagine never giving yourself credit for things you’ve done and convincing yourself that you’ve done absolutely nothing. Well, that’s what kept me tossing and turning the other night. The lack of giving myself credit resulted in sleepless nights where I doubt my abilities, scare myself into thinking I’m never going to amount to anything,…

Life Beyond the Comfort Zone

Our comfort zone has a real way of babying us. We have grown so accustomed to knowing how things function and work that we don’t see a reason to shake up the routine and flip the script. Eventually, reality will serve us a cold dish that only palettes ready for change can handle. It won’t…

To the Nola Darling in Us

We all have a little Nola Darling in us. It wasn’t until I watched Season 2 of She’s Gotta Have It that I realized we all have her braids and paint strokes somewhere within us. Some have tried to put her in a box and describe her in just one way but I see her…

A Message to Creatives

It all started with an idea. An idea that deserved to be turned into a reality. You stayed up until 3am writing your plan and making sure it was tight. You prayed that it would work and that people would see the vibes. You finally execute and it’s a hit! Everyone loves it, you’re getting…

Faking It

  It started a few weeks ago. I was in a large crowd and suddenly began to feel like I was shrinking. I felt alone and confused, even though I was surrounded by people who I adored. I felt invisible even though people were directly interacting with me. Instead of doing something about it, I…